What time frame constitutes being a newlywed? 1 year, 2 years, 1.5 years? Dr. B and I have been married for 1 year and 5 months. Are we till considered newlyweds…or is the honeymoon – over? For whatever reason I’ve been thinking about how much longer we have before our Newlywed status runs out. When it does, I will have to change the name of my blog. Am I late already in that regard? I’m not one to mislead readers, and hold faux claim to a title that I’m no longer eligible for. When does one said couple transition from newlywed status to just being – married?
Dr. B and I attended a beautiful outdoor wedding this weekend at the Royal Links golf course. I was admittedly a “little” astounded that someone would have a Wedding in September in Florida at 5:30. Especially given the fact that Florida is still HOT in September. But, being a recent bride, and knowing all the criticisms that you have to deal with when planning a wedding, I kept my opinion under wraps. When we arrived at the venue we were given bottles of water, and large white umbrellas while we waited for the ceremony to start.
Everything was going great, I wasn’t too hot, the ceremony started on time. But, please someone tell me why did the pastor used an iPad to conduct the ceremony? I have an iPad, I’m an #AppleFanGirl, Steve Jobs can do no wrong, life is better with a iPhone, but I have to draw the line at the pastor conducting a wedding ceremony with a iPad. Just, No, No, No. He couldn’t just read off of a notecard? He had to be a showoff…*you fancy huh* :-) The main problem that I had with him using the iPad was that, had the iPad in one hand and the microphone in the other, and he was trying to do a balancing act (not good). He looked uncomfortable :-(
Am I overreacting, what do you think yes or no to the pastor using an iPad for a wedding ceremony?
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Our wedding reception took place two weeks after our *fabulous* Las Vegas wedding(check out our wedding video Dr. B produced)! Early on in the wedding planning process we decided we wanted our reception to have an informal, party-like atmosphere, with a fun theme. We decided to go with a Caribbean theme so our guests could feast on the flavors of the Caribbean, and we could hire a steel drum player(I’m a big fan of island music). To add to the Caribbean vibe we held the reception in our back yeard in a big white tent. In addition we used small pop-up tents for the food, wedding favors, and gift table, and the kids area (which we named Kid’s Caribe Cafe).
Afterwards, we had so many comments from friends and family alluding to the fact that we probably “saved lots of money”…wow ..if that were only true! Yes, we had a very small destination wedding in Las Vegas. Yes, the reception was in our back yard, but, no! It was not “cheaper” by any means. We hired tons of help: three photographers, invitations, hair dresser, makeup artist, reception coordinator, 2 bartenders, 3 servers, caterer, and steel drum player (who charged more than the cost of the tent), and if you have ever gone to Vegas you know that it’s not a cheap trip by any means. But, what I can say is we did it our way, and we paid cash for every. single. thing. *pumps fist in the air* We had the wedding of our dreams and a reception of a life time, and to top it off we were surrounded by friends and family that support, love, and care for us.
The reception seemed to fly by…I felt like I was floating. It was such a wonderful feeling to let go, and enjoy the day that we worked so hard to plan. All I can remember was tons of hugging, great music, fabulous food, and awesome drinks (yep, I in every picture I have a drink in my hand).
Without further ado…here’s are our reception pictures on Flickr…enjoy!
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I was skimming through CNN‘s Living Section when I came across the article, “15 Women and Why They Said No to Marriage.” Being a newlywed I was drawn to the article. Obviously my opinion of marriage is biased. Although it took 35 years, I always knew there was someone out there for me. When I finally did meet The One, I knew it. The relationship felt different, smelled different, and tasted different :) Marriage was a natural progression in our relationship. For some it takes years, for us it took months (10 to be exact). So, as I read through those 15 women’s reasons, I couldn’t help but, wonder…”what’s so bad about marriage?” Did I miss the memo? Was I supposed to not want to marry Dr. B? Was I the odd woman out?
As you read through the readers comments, they are equally mixed with pro and con marriage comments, from both men and women. Here is what I said:
I don’t understand the reason for this article. Is it a platform for women to vent? What about including 15 women who chose to say yeas marriage? What’s so wrong with marriage? I’m 36 and recently married the love of my life. And even at that ripe old age I wasn’t desperate and neither was he. For us married was a natural progression in our relationship. We both knew each other was the one. We lived together for 8 months, got engaged and, then got married after a 3 month engagement. It was simply two adults in love, and committed to each other for the rest our lives. The decision to marry didn’t cause any trauma, drama, or dilemma.
The wedding ceremony is a celebration – an outward sign to the world that you love each other and are committed to each other. I don’t see what’s so wrong with that. I believe when we find The One, all the excuses that we use as for why we don’t want to get married go away (they don’t even put up a fight).
Furthermore, I believe that if you really truly love that person, then it’s not about a piece of paper. But, it is about legally protecting your loved one in case something does happen to him or her(unless your lucky enough to live in common law marriage state). Wouldn’t you want to make sure your loved one is taken care of? Why leave it up to the court to question the validity of your relationship (I’m just saying…). The world recognizes the sanctity of marriage. Look at the tax breaks, and the credit benefits of marriage.
If living together is as good as being married, then why are same-sex couples trying their hardest to be legally recognized as partners for life(I’m just saying…).
So, dear readers help me understand this new “anti-marriage” mindset…the floor is yours.
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During our wedding ceremony Dr. B and I read our own vows, and recited the traditional vows. We both felt it was important to be able to freely express our love for
each other, while at the same time keeping with hundreds of years of wedding tradition. When we made the decision to write our vows, I was excited! After reading so much wedding porn, I had romanticized ideas swirling through my head. That is until I actually sat down to write them a month before our wedding. I got scared and stressed. I realized I had never written down my feelings for my husband-to-be. I consider myself a “good” writer, and words come naturally to me. But, it’s something about writing the words that will seal a life-long union, that makes the process a little overwhelming. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to clearly capture the essence of my love for Dr. B. I was also afraid that I would sound like a bad greeting card(and embarrass myself). For inspiration and guidance I searched the Internet for love poems, bible scriptures, blogs, and read articles on how to write your wedding vows. It took several sleepless nights but, I think I did a pretty good job.
I guess I’m posting my vows because every morning I wake up besides my wonderful, generous, kind, patient, intelligent, gentle, understanding….Husband! How’s that for a reason to post your vows for the world to see :) So, here they are my wedding vows…
No one tells you when your young, what no one seems to understand, is that the best thing you can do is find the person that makes you want to be the best you possible.
The one person that does not complete you, but complements you, enhances you. Makes you shine your brightest next to them.
You, Bernard, are that person for me. I love you not only for who you are, but for who I am when I’m with you.
In the time that I have known you, I have found myself through my heart because of you.
YOU, love, ME for exactly who I am. You, with genuine loving patience, has peeled away my many layers, and spoken directly to my soul. Those walls I have built came tumbling down…they didn’t even put up a fight, they didn’t even make a sound.
My soul has come alive because of my love for you. In the Song of Solomon it says, “It was but a little that I passed from them, but I found him whom my soul loveth: I held him, and would not let him go.” Bernard, I promise I will hold on tight and not let you go.
Because, Paul D., you are my best thing. You love me when I am unlikeable. You see the small child in me and, the divine potential in me. You are the man of my dreams, the man of my hopes, and the man of my desires.
I Natasha, take you, Bernard, to be my husband. With the greatest joy I come into my new life with you. Today I am reminded of James 1:17 which says, “Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.”
Besides the gift of salvation, you are the most precious gift God has given me. I know that along with the new joys God has given me, I face new responsibilities that I cannot fulfill in my own strength.
But by God’s grace and power working within me, I desire to be trustworthy as your wife, to serve and love you in all circumstances, to obey you, to allow God to use you to build His qualities in me, as long as God give us life on this earth. I praise God continually for you, Bernard, and for your love and friendship.
Dear readers, did you or did you not write your own vows, and why? Please share your wedding vow stories.
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Initially I was going to write about our wedding reception that took place on Saturday. It was wonderful, eventful, and an all out fun day! Then I got to thinking about what made it so wonderful, eventful and fun – the help we received from our family and friends. For me it was reminiscent of a great basketball team, namely the 1992 Olympic Dream Team starring MJ. The day consisted of what I like to think of as the “2010 Team Williams starting lineup” tackling projects and tasks with assists, three pointers, dunks and fade away jumpers. I seriously doubt the Dream Team could have held it’s own against Team Williams on Saturday, they were in rare form. So, without further ado… here is The 2010 Team Williams Starting Lineup for Saturday June 19, 2010:
At point guard for Team Williams was our neighbor Chris….You see our backyard is not fenced in and butts up against our Chris’ farm. Chris was kind and agreed to allow our guests to use his driveway, and park in the back of his property. On Saturday we were setting up and decorating the tents when Chris rode out on his riding mower. He asked if we would like for him to mow a bigger patch of field than what Dr. B had originally mowed. I couldn’t believe it – how kind is that? I didn’t know people neighbors still did that, wow! Then, to add butter cream frosting to the cupcake – he asked would we like to borrow his tent. Seriously. How nice is that, especially coming from someone Dr. B and I have only talked to twice? Chris’ gestures was the first of many that occurred on Saturday. Not your ordinary everyday, run of the mill “hold the door open for you” gestures. More like the ‘I will do anything you need just tell me’ gestures. The ones that make you say, “I need to do better by others” – those kinds.
Next up was George our athletic power forward. George had never even seen, much less cleaned a fish with it’s head on. But, there he was Saturday morning standing beside my mom in the kitchen cleaning fish for the reception. You would have thought his father was the Morton fisherman. I’m mean George was like the super, duper ninja friend on steroids. He was all over the place and back again helping where ever he was needed – in the kitchen, outside – everywhere!
Starting at shooting guard for Team Williams was no other than my baby brother Bobby Hakeem Jamal. He was like my shadow. Where I went, he went. When I needed something all I had to do was mumble, and he would jet off to get it. My brother and I got into a great rhythm on Saturday. One in which I would start formulating an idea in my head, and somehow, he just knew what the heck I was talking about. It was great working side by side with my baby brother.
Lindsay and Bryan – surprised everyone in their positions as small forwards. I seriously need to give a big Natasha the Newlywed hug to those two. Poor kids, I worked them like they were in a Nicaraguan Chinese sweatshop. If you could have seen them in action. They were arranging place setting, hanging signs, setting chairs, and hauling tents. And, they didn’t even complain to my face. No, seriously, they were great! I gained a whole new level of respect for those two fifteen-year-olds.
Last but not least was the center, and the Team Williams franchise player, my mom. She was the one person who I didn’t want to to lift a finger, but somehow she found a way to be indispensible. She was directing and orchestrating the entire time behind, and sometimes much to my chagrin in front of the scenes. She was…super mom! Gotta love her :)
So there you have it…. The 2010 Team Williams starting lineup for Saturday June 19th. There were many, many more people that helped make our reception a huge success on Saturday – you know who you are, Thank You! We couldn’t have made it without you!
Dear readers can you recall a time that you were your family and friends came together line an NBA All-Star team and helped you out? Were you left standing there scratching your head amazed and in awe? Please tell…the floor is yours.
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