The Paradoxical Commandments: Love them Anyway

10 Aug

Recently I was reading a book called “Falling out of Fashion“.  It’s a short fiction novel written by same author who wroteThe Devil Wears Prada“,

The Paradoxical Commandments

Karen Yampolsky.  It’s a fun entertaining book that follows the main character, Jill, as she rises and falls through out her career in the fashion magazine industry.  In one chapter Jill  is in the hospital after a miscarriage.  To add fuel to the fire, her job as editor at Jill magazine is an absolute nightmare due to a unscrupulous boss.  Jill’s best friend Sarah visits her in the hospital and gives her a piece of advice, which is actually a quote by Mother Theresa,

“If you are successful you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.  What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.”

I was really touched by this quote, as it coincided with some recent events in my life.  There have been a couple of “friends” who were in the  front row of our marriage, whom we have had to move to the Very.Last. Row. of the balcony.  We have helped these individual in one way or another.  Now,  all of a sudden(according to them) Dr. B and I are their worst enemies – really?  These people even went so far as to “unfriend” us on Facebook…seriously, grow up.

So, feelings that coming across this quote was not a coincident, I Googled the quote.  Mr. Google told me that Mother Theresa actually had it rewritten in a more spiritual way for her home for children in Calcutta, India. The quote was written on a wall for all to see. The original author is Kent Keith, and the original work is called the The Paradoxical Commandments.”.  It was written in 1968 as a part of a booklet for student leaders.  The Commandments are still very relevant and fitting for today’s society.  I even found them to be very appropriate for newlyweds.  The road ahead for newlyweds is going to full of ups, and downs, enemies, friends, good times, and bad times…I especially love the first commandment:  “People are illogical, unreasonable , and self-centered. Love them anyway.”

Although these people are out of my front row, I’m not going to let that deter me from making friends, and allowing to eventually have front row seats .  As the first commandment says, “Love them anyway.”

As you read the Paradoxical Commandments, I hope you you able to take away a few words of wisdom that can help sustain you through your marries, and through life.  And I hope our “unfriends” will come across my blog post and find a little wisdom and guidance that will lead them in their future relationships.


The Paradoxical Commandments

by Dr. Kent M. Keith

  1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
    Love them anyway.
  2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
    Do good anyway.
  3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
    Succeed anyway.
  4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
    Do good anyway.
  5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
    Be honest and frank anyway.
  6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
    Think big anyway.
  7. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
    Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
  8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
    Build anyway.
  9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
    Help people anyway.
  10. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
    Give the world the best you have anyway.
Enhanced by ZemantaWhat is your favorite commandment?  Do you see a spiritual connection in them?
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5 Responses to “The Paradoxical Commandments: Love them Anyway”

  1. Bernard August 10, 2010 at 12:09 pm #

    Those are really great words of wisdom. I am going to try harder to live my life by them. Thanks for sharing!!

  2. Happy Nappy Bride August 10, 2010 at 10:49 pm #

    I think I’m guilty of #4 in our marriage. My sweetie does a lot of great stuff, but I sometimes focus on the negative and forget about the positive.

  3. Tiffany In Houston August 12, 2010 at 5:23 pm #

    Number 1 and number 9 really reasonate with me. I am sorry that your friends have turned on you. I’ve talked about it at length on my blog and unfortunately, that’s how life is.

    • natashawilliams August 12, 2010 at 8:15 pm #

      Number 9 is a tough one. Especially when someone comes to you for help then gets mad when you don’t give them the help or advice they were seeking – you actually give them the truth.

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