Dr. B and I are a shameless Apple “fancouple”. We both own Macbook pros, he has a 15 inch and I have a 13 inch; we both have iPhone 4’s; and we both have iPads (yes, I know…it’s overkill). We are a very technology-driven(nerdy) couple. Heck, we even met on Match.com (thank you Match!) We can spend hours side-by-side online, reading, surfing, and researching whatever interests us at that moment. Needless to say, it takes a little pulling to get us to unplug. So, when I came across this free marriage course “Marriage Mojo Guide to Romance for Insanely Busy Couples,” from A Simple Marriage I was happy to sign-up (heck it’s free).
The topic of the first lesson was finding 15 minutes a day to talk to your spouse, sans tv, telephone, computer, etc… Dr. B was game, so we decided to set aside 15 minutes right after he came home from work. It was great! We actually talked longer than 15 minutes. During our second 15 minute session, we talked candidly about reducing the price of our house that we have up for sale. In the end we agreed on a price that were both happy with. In another session we talked about our first joint credit card that we just received. We discussed our spending expectations, spending limitations, and making wise credit decisions. I have thoroughly enjoyed our sessions, and I look forward to them everyday.
Today we will discuss lesson #3 which is “What is Your Dream Marriage.” I’m excited to hear Dr. B’s dream marriage, and to see if it aligns with my idea of our dream marriage. The lesson says that the romantic part of the exercise is the actual sharing of your thoughts with your spouse.
Your individual summaries are a great tool to get your minds opened up and your ideas flowing. However, the real romantic power in this exercise comes when you share your thoughts with your spouse.
I recommend that you take turns telling each other about the lifestyle you envisioned and wrote down. Do not interrupt your spouse, and do not discuss your thoughts until you have both had a chance to speak.
I suspect you’ll find that the words you wrote down take on a different meaning when you’re speaking them to the person they most directly impact. And things many get a bit emotional.
The lesson includes questions to consider while constructing our ideal marriage. Dr. B and I agreed that we would go down the list and answer the questions. From there we would openly discuss our answers. Here is the list questions, remember they are just guides to help you construct your overall vision:
- How would you spend your time?
- Where would you live?
- How do children fit in?
- Would you work – where and how much?
- How often would you have sex?
- How would you show your spouse you love them?
- Would you pray together, attend Church regularly or maybe start your own cult (just kidding, unless of course you are both big fans of the cult lifestyle)?
- How would you interact and communicate each day?
- Would you play sports together, exercise more or spend more time alone enjoying your individual hobbies?
- Would you read more, watch more T.V. or travel abroad as nomads?
I’m super excited and looking forward to today’s 15 minute session. This is a great topic, and one that I have never actually thought about. What better time to do in than on our two month anniversary!!!!
What does your dream relationship or marriage look like? Have you thought about? Have you ever discussed your dream marriage with your spouse or significant other?
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